Tuesday, 29 July 2014

Elections

Whenever elections are to be held in Nilkawt, there is an official public holiday held, with great celebrations, as soon as the formal announcement is made.  Unlike other electoral systems around the world, except, perhaps, for the sort of similar one in the Vatican, only serving cabinet ministers are eligible to vote.

In Nilkawt, all Nilkawtians, except for cabinet ministers, ambassadors, and all the domestic servants of the royal household and Nilkawtian embassies, are already semi-permanent members of the Nilkawtian parliament.  The parliamentarians may choose to turn up for parliamentary sessions, or not, as they see fit.

The main duty of the cabinet, rather than the parliament, during elections, is to choose unsuspecting successors for cabinet positions.  The successful successors are then dismissed from parliament temporarily and are subsequently required to join the cabinet, regardless of whether they wish to do so or not.

Only parliamentarians not nominating for particular cabinet positions, or any cabinet positions at all, are eligible to become government ministers.  This means that Nilkawt happily avoids the miseries of other societies.  In most societies, career politicians frequently become a nuisance.

Most Nilkawtians, having no desire at all to serve in a government, use the opportunity of the public holiday to hide themselves away somewhere.   Many wish to keep a low profile until well after the votes are counted.  This is rarely possible if they are known to have raised their profile in parliament, society or the media in the past.

The Constitution of Nilkawt states that the formal announcements of the elections shall be held in the Thrown Room of the royal palace at 3pm on the second Thursday in May in the year after a leap year, and on the third Wednesday in May in every other year, regardless of the weather.  The public holiday then begins immediately and lasts for exactly three weeks, three hours and three minutes.

Although the formal announcements are made every year, the elections themselves are held every two years, on the last day of September, with the votes counted on the same evening.  Everyone loves an excuse for a public holiday but some people have a strange aversion to elections.