Wednesday, 28 December 2016

Enlightened Nations Resolution

The latest Enlightened Nations Resolution is known as Purple 33.  It resolves the problems in the world caused by the United Nations, the World Bank, the Whirled Bank, the International Monetary Fund, the International Money Tree Fund, the World Economic Forum and the Enlightenment Union.

Everyone knows that the United Nations is not united, the World Bank perpetuates poverty, the Whirled Bank pretends to recycle money but only whirls it towards the rich, the International Monetary Fund undermines democracy, the International Money Tree Fund stores money away for no known purpose, the World Economic Forum only supports plutocrats and the Enlightenment Union is not enlightened.

Nilkawt has always supplied leadership in the development of reasonable international law.

Nilkawt has always upheld fair and sensible contractual agreements at the local, national and international levels.

The uncommon law of Nilkawt is itself an expression of enlightenment not only within Nilkawtian society but also in the international sphere.  That is why Nilkawt has Most Enlightened Nation Status within the Enlightened Nations.

The Nilkawtian Office of Statistical Enlightenment helps to enlighten many legislative, administrative and judicial decisions.  With the assistance of The Most Reasonable Company of Simplifiers, the office helps to display the essential data elegantly and relevantly.  This is particularly useful when working with other enlightened nations to reach agreement.

The accounting methods of the Enlightened Nations provide the philanthropic foundation for providing persons from unenlightened nations with seasonal work.  As with all enlightened nations, Nilkawt supports open international relations whenever and wherever appropriate.

Properly preparing for any Enlightened Nations Conference is an important indication of seriousness, competence and conscientiousness amongst the delegates.  Wastefulness and abusiveness must be avoided at all times by representatives of any member nation of the Enlightened Nations. 

A realistic government budget is always important to maintain within the Enlightened Nations, particularly in relation to sovereignty.  Resolution Purple 33 is a matter relating to sovereignty.

The citizen-advocates of Nilkawt do their best to help ensure all representatives of Nilkawt act in the best interests of the Nilkawtian people at all times and in all places.  The citizen-advocates take a particularly keen interest in matters relating to enrolment and ennoblement.

Since Nilkawt developed its new trade and investment strategy, all members of the Enlightened Nations have attempted to follow its lead.  Nilkawt's international peace strategy is also having a considerable influence in and between the other enlightened nations.

Resolution Purple 33 relates to the peaceful overthrow of incompetently ruled nations, empires and principalities.  The resolution requires the implementation of an enlightened constitution and the reasonable rule of law in every area of the world where those essential services are lacking.

Tuesday, 20 December 2016

Results of Referendum

In the local government offices of Nilkawt, and in the parliament itself, the deliberative referendum on the future name for the County of State has resolved overwhelmingly that the best name for the county is Twaklintonshire.

The deliberative referendum process is unlikely to go to a ballot as no-one has yet provided any sensible reasons why the new name should not be adopted immediately.  There had originally been much argument as to whether options c, d or e would be best.  Options a and b were immediately rejected by just about everyone.  Only a few comedians wanted option f.  Several undecided persons wanted option g.

A compromise between c, d and e was therefore the best option to consider, which is why Twaklintonshire has been chosen.  The entire cabinet is in agreement with the decision.

Wednesday, 14 December 2016

Gross Domestic Product

Since the restoration of the money key in Nilkawt, GDP has officially risen considerably.  This has mainly been as a consequence of boom-like prosperity in Backoutshire and Elegantshire.

Even so, there has been much concern expressed in parliament.  It is feared that the beautiful Nilkawtian national parks could be under threat from proposals for new infrastructure.

The Minister for Housing has been reviewing the situation.  The cabinet has recently proposed that the entire County of State should immediately become a conservation zone.

There are also many other matters requiring decisions.  No-one wants to deal with the ongoing constitutional conundrums.  Unfortunately, the consequential traffic through the remote wilderness areas of the royal palace grounds have been causing considerable disruption and disturbance.  This is an urgent issue of national security.

Backoutshire was once known as the Ethereal Kingdom of Back.  It was, at that time, imaginatively ruled by the Mozart siblings.

Since becoming a county of Nilkawt, the former kingdom is an integral part of the Nilkawtian system of local government.  Lord Dughall Google Platter-Plus-Bugle, the current Earl of Backoutshire is soon to end his tenure as the chief officer of that county.

For a significant amount of time now, the earl has also been assisting the Head of State with her considerable constitutional duties.  That has prevented the earl from touring the training facilities of Backoutshire as regularly as he would prefer.

Lord Backoutshire, as he is also known, wishes to extend his influence in relation to the further industrial development of Nilkawt.  He is particularly interested in expanding opportunities for business in Backoutshire.  Yet the traditional transitional arrangements of the Nilkawtians will probably prevent him from having as much influence as he would prefer.  The Earldom of Backoutshire is about to lapse.

As The Most Reasonable Company of Simplifiers has already been asked to look into all the most complicated problems in Nilkawt, the cabinet hopes most of the problems will be solved quite easily within the next few days.

The Company has already provided the cabinet with a confidential assessment of the border and broader issues.  It is already known, by most Nilkawtians, that currency trading has been causing artificial perceptions of prosperity in various parts of the world. 

In neighbouring Little Outbush, for example, most of the country has been developed into Merrie Olde Little Outbush, a Utopian Pseudo-England with much better weather than the real one.  Yet the currency of Little Outbush, the Duckling, has suffered a major decline since its borders closed.

There may even be artificial perceptions of poverty occurring around the globe, especially with so many persons claiming hardship whilst living in comparatively expensive houses in relatively peaceful locations. The Nilkawtian government budget not only addresses such problems locally but also globally.

The difficulties for returning citizens to Nilkawt are continuing as they gather at the only open border, waiting to pass in single file through the passport control point.  The outreach services of the Perpetual Wait are kept busy.

In the County of State, there is much concern about the current barriers to trade.  The caves under Dada, Backoutshire and Foolya have many mysterious twists and turns.  The crisis in Little Outbush has caused a funnel tunnel effect down rabbit holes, wombat holes and Hobbit holes in the principality.  Everyone is trying to escape.

For some strange reason, increasing GDP is a considerable concern of governments around the world.  It apparently means gross domestic product.  But what does gross domestic product really mean?

It apparently refers to the market value of all items currently for sale.  It is measured in money, particularly the money likely to be exchanged between buyers and sellers.  It does not measure the usefulness or peacefulness of the market itself.  It does not measure poverty or pollution or inequality.

The Nilkawtians do all they can to prevent economic inequality within their own society.  The Constitution states that every Nilkawtian is equally entitled to live in a beautiful, healthy environment and enjoy a peaceful, prosperous society.  That is why so many Nilkawtians are continuing to make their way home from other parts of the world.

Friday, 9 December 2016

National Security

With the borders of Nilkawt currently being endured as excessively challenging obstacles by many ordinary members of the public, the Nilkawtian cabinet continues to contemplate measures to address the situation safely.

This includes a review of the management of land.  It does not really require yet another review of tender processes though such a national security review of tender processes may be necessary in relation to land and borders.

The Minister for Brilliance, Prosperity and Pleasant Foreign Relations has suggested the democratic annexation of the principality of Little Outbush, particularly as only three people are permitted to vote in the principality.  Two of those voters are about to return home from a cruise around New Zealand.

The Minister for Health, Defence and Delightful Environments prefers the further touristic and strategic development of the Nilkawtian cave system as a safer option, particularly as there are quite a few children currently living in Little Outbush, all of whom are precocious child actors.

A meeting of the sublime secretariat yesterday came to the conclusion that Nilkawtian contractual agreements should be examined further, particularly in relation to the other borders of the ethereal grand duchy.  Most of the farm land on the other side of Nilkawt's borders is owned by Nilkawtian citizens and residents though it is mostly leased to Australian farmers.

Nilkawtians are always keen to maintain the integrity of their personal and national security and reliability.  This is why they have a clear and reasonable international peace strategy.

Thursday, 8 December 2016

Twaklinaeum

The Twaklinaeum is the official Nilkawtian institute of cultural diplomacy.  It is based in Twaklinton, the capital of Nilkawt though much of its work is conducted in and from Adelaide in Australia.

The culture of Nilkawt especially relates to its agriculture and horticulture, as well as its literature and architecture and culinary achievements.  Nilkawtian cookery books are obviously works of art in themselves.

The director of the Twaklinaeum is currently Ms Kali Pathi-Pathos, a former Nilkawtian attorney-general.  One of the main duties of the director is to ascertain the suitability of an institution for the patronage of the Nilkawtian head of state.  The head of state is, quite obviously, the patron of the Twaklinaeum.

Through the Twaklinaeum, the Nilkawtian Association of South Australia is supported.  The association itself is also under the patronage of the Nilkawtian head of state.

On an international scale, the work of the Twaklinaeum is meant to be supported by the ambassador-at-large for the International Promotion of Nilkawtian Banqueting.  His Excellency Mr Groper Tait O'Sullivan, a former Nilkawtian minister for agriculture, is the current ambassador-at-large.

His Excellency is, however, spending much of his time cruising the world, at his own expense, comparing the banquets and buffets on board with those in Nilkawt.  He has delegated many of his ambassadorial duties to Mr Rollo Polo, a former Nilkawtian minister for arts and sciences.

Mr Polo takes a particular interest in the culinary arts, including the commercial aspects.  That may be why he charges considerable fees to everyone seeking to attend a Nilkawtian banquet, long before they receive the formal invitations to experience one.

The Nilkawtian tourism commissioner is usually in attendance at every Nilkawtian banquet, wherever those banquets take place.  The work of the commissioner, Sir Wolfie A Mozart, is also conducted under the patronage of the head of state, via the Twaklinaeum.

Through the Twaklinaeum, various Nilkawtian arts practitioners are commissioned to explain the Nilkawtian levels of government to the world.  The commissioned arts practitioners are required to do so through various mediums at various banquets in various areas of the international sphere.

The Nilkawtian head of state is also the patron of the Twaklinian School of International and Constitutional Law and Peace, National School of Acting and Effective Action, the Institute of the Twaklinesque, the Foolya Biennale and the Secular Order of the Perpetual Wait.

Thursday, 24 November 2016

Nilkawtian Association of South Australia

One of the best ways for non-Nilkawtians to gain an appreciation of Nilkawt and Nilkawtian society is by joining an official Nilkawtian association.

Within Nilkawt itself, considerable training is required before being eligible to join any sort of official association.  For example, the Royal Palace Association of Suitably Qualified Tour Guides currently only has three full members.

The other twenty-eight tour guides are still in training though they are already capable to doing the job without notes, even at short notice.  However, they are not yet quite able to do the job without a map of the palace.

The Reliable Retailing Association of Nilkawt similarly requires a high level of training for full membership.  As well as the information supplied by any person selling any sort of product in Nilkawt, all products sold in Nilkawt are expected to be of the highest possible level of reliability, within reason.

Most full members of the Reliable Retailing Association of Nilkawt are based in Elegantshire.  This is why The Most Reasonable Company of Simplifiers will usually also be involved in assessing the qualities of products and services in and beyond the better parts of Nilkawt.

The Nilkawtian Association of South Australia (NASA) holds its digital meetings in the natural common room of the gatehouse associated with Villa Twaklinilkawt.  The patron of the association is the Nilkawtian Ambassador to the Digital Sphere, Her Excellency Madam Magda Carter, though Madam Carter does not attend those meetings herself.

The Nilkawtian Association of South Australia enhances and celebrates the peaceful and prosperous relationship between Nilkawt and South Australia, or at least the Nilkawtian relationship with South Australian members of the association.

Wednesday, 23 November 2016

Referendum

Unlike the other Nilkawtian counties, the County of State has never had any but a boring, administrative name.  In that regard, it is very much like parts of Australia.  Yet unlike Australia, the names of places have never reflected colonialism.  Nilkawt was founded upon a fair and open contractual agreement.

The current capital city of Nilkawt, Twaklinton, was originally called The Capital.  Likewise, the new royal palace, Palazzo Twaklinilkawt, was originally merely called the new royal palace.

Yet unimaginative, bureaucratic boringness has never appealed to the Nilkawtians, which is why the Government of Nilkawt has recently decided to hold a referendum for new names for the County of State and for all of the parts of the county with boring names.

For example, all the villages in the County of State were originally given numbers rather than names, as were the farms, the roads and the parks.  Yet there are many administrative procedures to follow in Nilkawt when considering changing names, boundaries and titles.  Most of those procedures are based on tradition.

So far, the proposal for the title of the County of State seeks to invite the public to state whether they want to:

a) Keep the name as County of State

b) Change the name to Capital Territory

c) Change the name to Greater Twaklinton

d) Change the name to Twaklinshire

e) Change the name to something else entirely

f) Change the name to Something Else Entirely

g) Hold the referendum again later as making a decision is too difficult at present

Monday, 21 November 2016

Energy

Nilkawt is a extra-low voltage society.  It is also a low gas society, at least as far as pipelines are concerned.  Its main, original biogas plant is rarely needed to run at full capacity, mostly due to the fact that there are now many mini biogas plants in Nilkawt, along with solar panels and Savonius wind turbines.  There are microgrids and battery banks dotted appropriately amongst all the residential, business and industrial areas. 

In rural areas, there are wood gas generators of electricity.  The heat from the generators is also used to extract and reuse the water from the wood, and to reclaim water from other sources, mainly for irrigation purposes.  Similarly, with all the biogas plants.  Waste water is recycled considerably in Nilkawtian non-food industries.

There are many mysteries of electricity, just as there are with gravity.  There are many electric motors used in Nilkawt but no internal combustion engines.

Wednesday, 16 November 2016

More Constitutional Conundrums

The transition of Nilkawtian society from a mainly medieval yet purportedly democratic one to a mainly modern and properly democratic one is apparently still continuing.  The previous head of state appointed all the current chief officers of the Counties at the beginning of June 2012.  Those persons are meant to stay in their predominantly ceremonial local government positions until the end of May 2019.

Under the former head of state, there was a compulsory obligation on the appointee to take up the position.  The Jubilee Ethereal Diamond Honours List originally required the appointee to take up their duties for 700 years instead of seven.

The current head of state recently mentioned that she had once held ambitions to become the Countess of Elegantshire instead of the Countess of Dada, yet the county of Dada has the nicer crown and the more majestic, rose-embroidered ceremonial gown.  It also has the magnificent official private residence of the Dadadian chief officer, namely Castle Zinziere.

The splendidly superior sovereign rose gold crown of Dada, with its perfect sixty pink diamonds, elevates the prestige of Dadadian dignity above that of Elegantshire and every other Nilkawtian county except the County of State.  There is no chief officer of the County of State other than the head of state.

In geographical terms the Ethereal Grand Duchy is slightly larger than metropolitan Adelaide though its population, on recent estimates, appears to be about half that of the aforementioned metropolis. Each Nilkawtian county is an artistic territory in its own right and often considered to be of significant global importance.

When the Countess of Dada became the Ethereal Grand Duchess of Nilkawt, she maintained her former castle and title and crown and gown and ceremonial duties.  Here illustrious highness acceded the throne on Wednesday, 23 April 2014.

Shortly afterwards, this digital embassy began its services to Nilkawtians and the world.  However, there are no indications in the Nilkawtian Constitution about the legitimacy of digital diplomacy.  Whether anything announced through this embassy is legitimate is therefore a matter of much speculation at present.

Additionally, the neighbouring Principality of Little Outbush, which is much smaller than Nilkawt but grander in ethereal status, has been in considerable political, social and financial turmoil recently.  His Royal Highness, the very young, acne-faced Prince Brett-Zitt VIII, has separated from his wife, the former glamour model-celebutante-reality television participant, Kate the Arrogant.  They had only been married for three days.

Kate is the daughter of Brunhilda of Merkel-Austrasia and Johann Majeur of Hunting-Down.  She is living in the Grand Palace of Little Outbush while Prince Brett-Zitt has abdicated and taken a cruise to New Zealand with his mother, Princess Prudence.

Princess Prudence has long been known by the name she used as a former art student, Prue Raffle-Light.  She has been a highly popular public figure in Little Outbushian society, unlike her late husband.

Unlike Nilkawt, which remains an entirely independent state, Little Outbush has been a member of the authoritarian Enlightenment Union (EU) since the then autocratic ruler of Little Outbush, Prince Parly Men-Tory X-XCVI, the aforementioned late husband of Princess Prudence, signed the Mess Trick Treaty in February 1992.

Princess Kate has now assumed the responsibilities of an enlightened despot, in accordance with the Mess Trick Treaty.  Unfortunately for the Nilkawtians, the arrogant princess has closed all the borders of Little Outbush in order to keep out tabloid journalists and paparazzi photographers.  This means that the Nilkawtians and their visitors can no longer enter and exit Nilkawt through Little Outbushian territory.

The Constitutional of Nilkawt states that the Nilkawtians will do everything in their power to maintain peaceful relations with their neighbours.  They are currently unsure how to proceed next.  None of the other land routes between Nilkawt and the outside world have been in good repair for the past seventy years.

The only relatively accessible way into Nilkawt at present is along a long and narrow track through a network of mainly mysterious caves.


If you have significant privileges, you will be able to examine the historical documentation of Nilkawtian history and constitutional conundrums for yourself:


The Mess Trick Treaty version two

Appointment of the Countess of Dada

By appointment to the Countess of Dada

An enlightened definition of Dada

The appointment of the Ethereal Grand Duchess

The matter of history



If you are not particularly privileged, you can easily continue your research as follows:

July 2014

August 2014

Tuesday, 15 November 2016

Undercover Operations

The locations of most Nilkawtians in the world are usually top secret.  Many Nilkawtians are involved in undercover operations to protect Nilkawtian sovereignty.  This work is reflected in the entry requirements for anyone wishing to enter Nilkawt.

Many Nilkawtian secret service agents are directly involved in the government of Nilkawt, often bypassing the cabinet.  Like members of the cabinet, they do not receive salaries for their work.

The further industrial development of Nilkawt requires an extensive, consistent and reliable system of capital controls.   The unique monetary policy of Nilkawt adds to the stability of its currently controls.  The Nikawtians also maintain a reasonably fixed exchange rate with the Australian dollar, for reasons of convenience.

Undercover operations take place within Nilkawt as well as in other countries and at border crossings, at airports and in various other internationally difficult situations.  In Nilkawt itself, undercover officers act at all levels of government to ensure all sorts of secretaries can keep all sorts of secrets.

Undercover officers also work within and through the sublime secretariat.  In such situations they are usually big data specialists.

Undercover agents are often involved in the management of tender processes in Nilkawt.  Their job is to prevent corruption occurring in negotiations and contracts.

If undercover officers are involved in global communications, they usually by-pass the Chief Secretary of Global Communications.  They can usually be found, or not, within the Chancery additional official offices.

Officially, there are no secret societies in Nilkawt, even within the Austrooliana Club.

Many citizen-advocates are former Nilkawtian secret service agents.  That is why they are trusted so highly by the public.

All public servants in Nilkawt, and even ordinary citizens, are expected to abide by the regulations of the Interpersonal Standards Organisation.

Several operatives are likely to be working undercover through the outreach services of the Perpetual Wait though no-one is willing to reveal where and why and how.

Whether a former Nilkawtian defence minister was an undercover double agent has long been a matter of gossip in Nilkawt.  The Nilkawtians are meant to maintain open international relations at all times.

Recruiting people to assist the Nilkawtian intelligence services is not usually particularly difficult, especially when people find their usual jobs otherwise quite boring.

Several undercover operations have been carried out from the guest wing of Villa Twaklinilkawt as well as the annex, at least since the restoration of the Money Key.

Please note that all the Ladies-in-Waiting to Her Illustrious Highness are intelligent intelligence gatherers, whatever they happen to be wearing.  Their main duty is to maintain Nilkawtian sovereignty.

Monday, 14 November 2016

County of State

Surrounding the Nilkawtian royal palace, Palazzo Twaklinilkawt, is Twaklinton, the capital city of Nilkawt.  Twaklinton is, in turn, surrounded by, and included within, the County of State, a local government area.

The County of State is surrounded by the other counties of Nilkawt:  Austrooliana, Backoutshire, Cupateeunkaique, Dada, Elegantshire and Foolya.

Most of the County of State, outside Twaklinton, is rural, peaceful and even bucolic.  Even most of the parklands of Twaklinton, and the parklands and wildlands in the royal palace grounds, are likewise.

There are environmental monitoring stations in the grounds of the royal palace, and in the parklands of Twaklinton and throughout the County of State.  These are scientifically calibrated to assess all sorts of natural and unnatural circumstances.

From the outside, the monitoring stations look like quaint holiday cottages.  Inside, they contain state-of-the-art laboratories.

The County of State is where the state of the Nilkawtian environment is now most carefully measured.  This was not formerly the case.

The director of the County of State Informational Resource Observatories (CSIRO) is Dr Henley Grange, a former Nilkawtian foreign minister.  Dr Grange is also responsible for all the bushfire prevention provisions in Nilkawt as well as all the biodiversity protection provisions.  He is also responsible for leading rescue missions whenever a rare marsupial or random bushwalker wanders into a cave near the Nilkawtian border.

Dr Grange and his colleagues have set up monitoring stations throughout the forests, farms and cave networks not only within Nilkawt but also in those in the surrounding countryside of neighbouring states.  Due to the prevalence of quaint cottages in and around Nilkawt, many unsuspecting tourists mistake them for the accommodation they have booked. 

Most tourists are, instead, given a key to a nondescript, uninsulated transportable cabin in an non-scenic area near a busy transportation route.  Those persons have usually failed to read the fine print stating that all photography is for illustrative purposes only and unlikely to be an accurate representation of the accommodation and services provided.

Dr Grange, on the other hand, seeks to ensure an accurate representation of science is provided to Nilkawtians and to tourists, and to anyone else for that matter.  Dr Grange is currently engaged to be married to the Minister for Housing.  He is, therefore, no longer a hermit though he still prefers to wear few or no clothes when not expecting visitors.

Friday, 11 November 2016

Reasonable Insurance Risk Commission

Every society has its risks.  Nilkawt is no exception.

Recently, a Reasonable Insurance Risk Commissioner was appointed to assess all sorts of risks within Nilkawt.  The commissioner's main duties will include identifying and auditing all risks and specifying the responsibilities associated with each risk.

The newly appointed commissioner, Mrs Jane Grange, is a former Nilkawtian defence minister.

The commissioner was appointed by the Great Saviour of the Treasury after considerable guidance and advice from a considerable number of other former Nilkawtian ministers.

A correlation has been widely observed concerning the fact that a travel advisory for visitors to Nilkawt has only ever been necessary after Mrs Grange had shown too much initiative and not enough courtesy.  As a former student of the Matildan School of Physical Education, Legal Traditions and Unjustifiable Wealth Transfers, Mrs Grange has used her skills to her own advantage on numerous occasions.  She has recently been advising the Minister for Housing on how to advance the wealth of a few Nilkawtians at the expense of the many.

Mrs Grange is a board member of the Dada School of Management.  She has a considerable knowledge of wealth distribution and wealth transfers but not as much knowledge of trade and investment as her sister.

As the former wife of a former Nilkawtian foreign minister, Mrs Grange believes she is an expert on risky relationships.

Thursday, 10 November 2016

Passports

As all Nilkawtians are dual nationals of Nilkawt and Australia, they are required to use two passports when entering and exiting Nilkawtian territory.  As this annex is itself considered to be part of Nilkawtian territory, for diplomatic purposes, all Nilkawtians entering it should have their Nilkawtian passports with them when seeking or offering assistance.

For non-Nilkawtian passport holders, entry requirements for the annex are highly restricted.  The entry requirements for Nilkawt are even more restricted than that.

The annex can often be visited on a virtual public tour of Villa Twaklinilkawt.  Indeed, you are likely to be participating in one of those tours whilst reading this documentation.  All tours are closely monitored by undercover Nilkawtian secret service operatives.

If you are not yet aware of the current entry requirements for Nilkawt, whether you are a Nilkawtian, an Australian or any other nationality, please inform yourself sufficiently about such matters with the urgency that pursuit requires.  As with any government decisions relating to immigration, the entry requirements at the borders are likely to change at very short notice.

For most Nilkawtian citizens, Nilkawtian passports are only valid for six weeks.  Most Nilkawtians do not take longer holidays than that, except in exceptional circumstances.  Additionally, Nilkawtian business travellers are expected to resume business in their normal environments as soon as possible.

Nilkawtians with Special International Tasks (SIT) to perform are usually able to obtain extended their passports for the duration of the SIT, particularly if required to travel long distances on an economy air ticket.

All Nilkawtians are expected to return to Nilkawt before the validity of their passports expires.  This embassy does not supply passports to anyone, under any circumstances.

To enter Nilkawt after the expiry of your Nikawtian passport, please apply for a tourist visa on your Australian passport.  You will also need to include your Nilkawtian passport with the application if you wish to avoid delays and considerable fines at the border.

All returning citizens should attempt do so with the dignity that process requires.

Wednesday, 9 November 2016

Roster of Competency

For all areas of local government in Nikawt, the Roster of Competency supplies all the necessary administrative and technical requirements.  The Nilkawtians are keen to ensure their local areas are managed as locally as possible, without the possibility of corruption, incompetence, obfuscation and obscurantism.

The Roster of Competency ensures that local secrets are brought into the open and all forms of privacy are respected.  This, in turn, assists the residents of each local area to enjoy a superior sense of belonging when compared with anywhere else in the world.


Tuesday, 8 November 2016

Electoral College

Although the local government of Nilkawt, and the government departments of the national government, often manage to manage themselves without too much difficulty, the Government of Nilkawt is principally managed, at least in theory, by the Nilkawtian Electoral College.

The number of electors in the Nilkawtian Electoral College varies depending upon the number of serving, but not necessarily deserving, cabinet ministers.  Although there has been much debate as to whether any electoral college is consistent with democratic principles, the Nilkawtian Electoral College is mainly a training facility.

Nilkawtian government elections are always considered to be learning processes, as any knowledge of the Office of Electoral Progress will indicate to you.  Nilkawt has a beautiful political system. No ugly politics is permitted in Nilkawt at all.

Whenever there is an important government announcement, it is made by the Head of State.  That important announcement is then transmitted to this embassy to be subsequently transmitted to the world at large.

Whenever there is an important government announcement, members of the Faculty for Official Historians are usually on standby in the palace and on various street corners around Nilkawt.  One or two of them are occasionally found here in the embassy, possibly during a tour of Villa Twaklinilkawt.

The historians in the palace and on the street corners record the reactions of the Nilkawtian public and various visitors.  The historians here are meant to record the reactions of the entire world.  They are likely to be recording reactions in several locations around Villa Twaklinilkawt today and tomorrow.

The Nilkawtian Electoral College most recently did its most important work on 30 September 2016.  The main duty of the Electoral College is to ensure the smooth transition from one cabinet to another.

The current cabinet officially became the new cabinet in March last year.  It is not yet known when the names of the next new cabinet will be announced.  It could be at any time between today and March 2018, though it is likely to be sooner rather than later.  Nilkawtians are averse to unnecessary suspense and speculation.

Until the new cabinet is officially announced, the current cabinet will be continuing its work as usual.  A similar situation occurred with the previous cabinet, much to the distress of the Nilkawtian people.  That may have had some bearing on the Constitutional Crisis of October 2014.

Monday, 7 November 2016

Restricted and Banned Items and Activities

Most guidance on what is banned, restricted or permitted in Nilkawt, and in various parts of Nilkawt, is supplied by the local government authorities.  This is important to understand if you wish to explore the investment opportunities in Nilkawt without experiencing difficulties.

If you are amongst the many returning citizens to Nilkawt, please note that the previously restricted and banned items and activities may have changed in your absence, as may the formerly permitted items and activities now banned or restricted.

The current list of banned items still includes frigates, chicken nuggets, submarines, jelly beans, nuclear missiles, metadata files, authoritarian uniforms, fairy floss, lawns, fighter jets, stock market bets, military helicopters, over-paid doctors, any sort of conscription, unwarranted prescriptions, ill-mannered visitors, firearms, burglar alarms, prisons, slaves, casinos, poker machines, pet food, uncomfortable shoes, computer games, cosmetic surgery, tobacco products, nail varnish, chocolate covered breakfast cereals, land mines, sporting equipment, deep fryers, circuses, lawn mowers, nightclubs, microphones, espresso machines, armoured vehicles, fast food restaurants, polystyrene drinking cups, artillery, pornography, mortars, over-capacity mortuaries, grenades, chewing gum, unhealthy brown liquids, mass-produced greeting cards, bayonets, bassinets and corporate sponsorship of the arts.

All restricted items and activities require permits.  You may apply for those permits at the border, subject to the ability to pay the fees.

For information on banned activities, please refer to the uncommon law.

Tuesday, 1 November 2016

International Peace Strategy

Nilkawt has long been known for its international peace strategy, at least in the most enlightened and delightful diplomatic circles.

The current Head of State of Nilkawt has had a long and successful career in the provision of calm and peaceful environments for local and international deliberations on all sorts of important matters.  Whether the persons in attendance at those deliberations consistently and reliably behave calmly and reasonably themselves has often been beyond the influence of Her Illustrious Highness, which is why she has developed a highly effective peaceful strategy to overcome such unpleasantness.

To ensure a peaceful and prosperous Nilkawt can be maintained, a peaceful and prosperous wider world must also be developed.  This starts in Adelaide, the location of this digital global embassy.

The Nilkawtians want their citizens to be able to visit and reside in pleasant areas of the world, not the unpleasant ones.  Nilkawtian citizens do their best to support the advancement and maintenance of a prosperous Adelaide.  They therefore do their best to support the advancement and maintenance of Adelaide's health services.  This is in keeping with the current strategy for the advancement and maintenance of health services, defence services and the protection of pleasant environments in Nilkawt itself.

For many years, only highly irritable persons were responsible for ministerial duties in relation to Nilkawt's defence.  This was in keeping with the defence strategies of many unenlightened nations, hence it was subject to review soon after the new, highly enlightened Head of State took up her position.

Former Nilkawtian defence ministers often bought up agricultural properties for their own benefit.  They subsequently sold the properties, for a highly reduced sum, to the Nilkawtian government as a way to avoid bankruptcy.  The same applied to other government ministers with real estate interests they could not afford to maintain.

Gradually, the Government of Nilkawt consolidated its global landholdings in one location, thereby simplifying the management of the property portfolio.  All land purchased by the Government of Nilkawt then passed to the symbolic ownership of the Head of State's crown or sun hat, depending upon the time of year.

The Nilkawtians have, for more than a year now, been seeking to expand their landholdings into Australia, for highly enlightened, trade and investment purposes.  This is in keeping with the Nilkawtian International Peace Strategy.

Security in and for Nilkawt is always associated with peace and pleasantness, and usually prosperity, too.  The immigration policies of Nilkawt are therefore intertwined with the investment policies.  Much effort has been made, by the Head of State, for the peace and justice policies to be incorporated into the immigration and investment policies, though there are apparently legal obstacles to that occurring.

At a diplomatic level, Nilkawt has an open international relations policy.  Whether an open domestic relations policy is also required has been of considerable debate in Nilkawt for several years now.  The citizen-advocates have been doing their best to achieve an open and honest outcome on the matter.


Monday, 31 October 2016

Tax Revenue

Nilkawt has the most enlightened taxation revenue system in the world.  It has the most sublime financial system.  It has the most thorough and systematic systems of review.

The taxation raised by the Nilkawtians is used mainly for scientific purposes.  The scientific systems in Nilkawt are themselves amongst the most systematic in the world.

The entry requirements for Nilkawt are themselves gradually becoming more systematic and scientific.  This will hopefully ensure greater clarity regarding the characteristics deemed to be acceptable of all visitors and potential citizens.  The fees and charges associated with visas are considerable, due to the fact that they are meant to offset tax revenues.

There has been much speculation as to whether the Nilkawtian Treasury will be reformed, modified, adapted, improved or restructured in the months ahead.  As in most societies, the Treasury of Nilkawt is currently a somewhat mysterious and undemocratic institution, much like the Ethereal Bank of Nilkawt.

The Treasury of Nilkawt is meant to balance everything beautifully, including its books.  Whether this involves having a head for figures, or a figurehead, or a head for heights, or the ability to balance a book on the head of an accountant, or an auditor or corporate lawyer, will always depend on the arithmetical evidence.

In any society, demographic matters are more intertwined with financial matters than democratic matters. This is clearly demonstrated through the revenue raising capabilities of the Ethereal Bank of Nilkawt.  All financial transactions in Nilkawt are currently taxed at 2% for internal transactions and 10% for transactions out of Nilkawt into the global financial system.

There are no taxes on money brought into Nilkawt though please note that there are no gambling facilities in Nilkawt, apart from the State Lottery for All the Talents.  Anyone caught gambling unofficially in Nilkawt, or speculating greedily in other ways, is fined in accordance with the debt-to-income ratio of the perpetrator.

Amongst other vital and confidential information, all persons seeking entry to Nilkawt are required to state, on their application form, the following:

a) Median personal income for the past twelve years, taking account of inflation/deflation and converting the amount to Australian dollars, as required.

b) Median household income for the past twenty-five years, with the figure calculated as in (a) above.

c) Current net personal worth including all real estate, art collections, shoe collections, antiques, motor vehicles, yachts, aircraft, investment portfolios, cash, jewels, bullion, royalties and fashion labels.

d) Current net worth of any likely inheritances.

e) Total expenditure by parent(s) and/or guardians/benefactors on your education and upbringing from birth to the age of twenty-five.  Please supply the figure in today's terms, as in (a) and (b) above.

f) Name, business address, home address and date of birth of usual accountant.

Although financial matters are rarely viewed elsewhere in the world in a systematically scientific way, nor are matters relating the citizenship.  This is why there are so many muddles and messes in the world.

The Nilkawtians have long had an enlightened and systematic approach to supplying members of the public with citizenship.  In line with social and psychological realities, the Criteria of Acceptance will most likely become tightened further over the coming months and years.

There are many costs involved with managing populations in fair, efficient and effective ways.  The purpose of the management is to supply citizens with a fair, efficient and effective society capable of upholding their peace, their health and their prosperity.

The populations may be animal or vegetable or bacterial or viral or fungal.  Breaching quarantine regulations is a matter on a par with attempted murder in Nilkawt.  It will therefore not be tolerated even slightly.

With a highly systematic and extraordinarily fair system of permits, licences, fines, fees, charges, levies, duties, rates and invoices, the Government of Nilkawt finds it unnecessary to tax most Nilkawtian citizens heavily.

Monday, 24 October 2016

Outreach Services of the Perpetual Wait

The Secular Order of the Perpetual Wait has its main training headquarters in the secluded Abbey of Needle's Eye.  The abbey is difficult to reach.  Like the rest of Nilkawt, it does not have an Internet service or a telephone connection to the outside world.

Unlike the rest of Nilkawt, the abbey has no connection to the national Intranet service.  Nor does it have any connections to any local area mobile telephone networks.

The abbey is situated in one of the most remote regions of Nilkawt, ensuring its seclusion but not necessarily its secularity.  To ensure its secularity is maintained, the Order of the Perpetual Wait is legislatively required to provide outreach services to all and sundry.  It does so not from the abbey itself but from its additional, much more temporary and temporal educational establishments.

Nilkawt is renowned across the globe for its educational and outreach services, whether by secular orders, international training centres, highly competent staff or infallible automatons.  Any envelopes or packages or postcards addressed to the abbey are redirected to the Secular Establishment of the Perpetual Wait in the capital, Twaklinton.

As a highly advanced, highly educated, calm, reasonable, rational and sensible sort of society, Nilkawt has a deep respect for evidence-based knowledge.  All seclusion therefore serves a similar personal, interpersonal and societal usefulness as all other forms of Nilkawtian learning.

Since a former abbess of Needle's Eye served a term as a Nilkawtian government minister, the educational work within the abbey itself has become better known in the outside world.  The former Department of Immigration and Broader Inspection has now become a considerably automated service.  This means that its former staff can now spend their time doing less tedious and less frustrating work.

In Nilkawt, as in many societies, there is a perpetual wait for redundancy packages.  In view of this, all Nilkawtians are now required to begin retraining for new work as soon as they become bored or frustrated in their existing occupations.  They have the option of reducing the hours in their occupations until completing the retraining on a part-time basis, or giving in their notice and completing the retraining on a full-time basis.

The first five hundred hours of retraining are currently supplied solely through the outreach services of the Perpetual Wait.  The first one hundred hours examine why the trainee has been doing a soul-less occupation.

Every job in Nilkawt is meant to be interesting, uplifting and intrinsically rewarding for the occupant, hence psychological, sociological and philosophical assessments of the trainee are integral to the early training process.  Every job in Nilkawt has been designed to be clean, tidy and practical, within reason.

If you are wondering how to become a Lady-in-Waiting to the Nilkawtian Head of State, the highly democratic process begins through the outreach services of the Perpetual Wait.  All members of the Order of the Perpetual Wait involved in supplying the outreach services are highly trained in psychology, sociology and philosophy, amongst other subjects.

No other persons are eligible to supply outreach services within Nilkawt. Even so, all Nilkawtians are expected to supply outreach services to the rest of the world, with or without all the necessary training.

Training in global outreach and peaceful advocacy can easily be acquired throughout the county of Cupateeunkaique.  It is a location in which affectionate co-operation and practical altruism are noticeably prevalent.  That is why the services of the Perpetual Wait are not required within Cupateeunkaique itself.

To maintain the pleasantness of Cupateeunkaique, and all other pleasant areas of Nilkawt, the local government administration of each Nilkawtian county is responsible for determining the local necessity for local outreach services.  As ceremonial local representatives of the Head of State, the relevant Heads of Counties, such as the Countess of Cupateeunkaique, provide the ceremonial authority for opening and closing and beginning and ending anything officially associated with the governing bodies of Nilkawt.

The Countess of Cupateeunkaique, who is herself a former member of the Order of the Perpetual Wait and a former Lady-in-Waiting, has been conducting an international investigation into outreach services through her duties on behalf of the Nilkawtian Political Reform Commission.  The world is, apparently, still not aware that Nilkawt is, at least for the present, the most enlightened and most democratic and most peaceful and most prosperous society ever to have existed.

The constitutional duties of the Nilkawtian Head of State are always performed with the utmost dignity.  Everyone in Nilkawt is required to perform their own duties with the utmost dignity too, even when bored, annoyed, frustrated or otherwise irritable.  

Credibility is so much easier to maintain with dignity, regardless of the accuracy of the information supplied or the competence of the supplier.  It is fortunate indeed, therefore, that the Nilkawtian Head of State is also highly competent.

As the Ethereal Patroness of the Secular Order of the Perpetual Wait, Her Illustrious Highness is the sole authority with the right to grant members of the Order with permission to leave the confines of their cloister on a temporary or permanent basis.  

Permission has only been granted, in the past, for a sister to leave the Abbey of Needle's Eye temporarily for one of the following reasons:

To take up temporary ministerial duties in the Goverment of Nilkawt, and/or

To provide temporary outreach services in Nilkawt and/or in the international sphere


Permission has only been granted to leave the abbey permanently:

To became a Lady-in-Waiting to Her Illustrious Highness, or

To explore the possibility of voluntarily developing non-asexual relationships

All serving members of the Order are always non-sexual in their dealings with everyone.  They are permitted to develop affectionate attachments of asexual intimacy, but only in private.  The same applies to Ladies-in-Waiting, who are required to maintain many of the same habits as the sisters but with a more extensive wardrobe and prettier footwear.

No-one with voluntary experience of non-asexual relationships is permitted to participate intimately in the supply of outreach activities through the Order.  To seek non-asexual relationships through the provision of outreach services is against the rules of the Order.

When any of the sisters reaches out her hand through her outreach activities, no-one could accuse her of having ulterior motives, no matter how much she flutters her eyelashes or how prettily she smiles.  She is likely to express emotional warmth whilst holding someone's hand or giving a person a hug or wiping away someone's tears, but this is always achieved silently.  The silence provides the necessary level of dignity, decorum and professional detachment.

Several sisters are currently providing outreach services through the Sublime Secretariat in Palazzo Twaklinilkawt.  Much of the routine work of the secretariat is now performed by a royal robot and three noble automatons.  There is nothing routine about the supply of outreach services, hence they can only be successfully performed by ordinary mortal humans and other living species.

Ethereal persons in the Ethereal Grand Duchy of Nilkawt, or anywhere else in the world, as well as corporate persons and various founts of honour, cannot provide the care required, except through fiction and works of history.  To provide an outreach service is a highly noble and highly spiritual pursuit, as long as it does not annoy either the providers or those being served.

As the outreach services of the Perpetual Wait are non-traditional, non-static and non-state-based, and they are never advertised, they are only usually communicated on a person-to-person basis.  The services may sometimes feature in media reports but usually only when the sisters are seeking the mutual support of the public.

The sisters believe most marketing is predatory and should be avoided by all good persons.  This applies both in terms of its supply and its receipt.  Similar beliefs are shared by most Nilkawtians.

Just as Nilkawt has many laws against trespassers and other nuisances, Nilkawtians would never intentionally trespass on anyone elsewhere or make a nuisance of themselves in other ways.  Nilkawt has many intentional communities, settlements and residential care institutions where professional services of the highest quality are available on a permanent basis.

Philanthropy in Nilkawt is particularly common in Cupateeunkaique, even during non-festive times.  In that location, the philanthropy is often associated with altruism, empathy and kindness.

In Foolya, on the other hand, philanthropy is associated mainly with the arts.

In Twaklinton, philanthropy is mainly associated with food and drink, tourism and other forms of hospitality, relaxation and celebration.

In Elegantshire, there is little philanthropy.  This is mostly due to the fact that the people living there, or even staying there temporarily, are expected to pay for professional services using their own substantial wealth for such purposes.  they are also expected to pay for all the other goods and services they require.  If the residents of Elegantshire wish to be philanthropists, they usually do so by donating sums of their own choosing to whatever they personally consider to be worthy causes.

In Dada, philanthropy is usually expressed through satire.

In Backoutshire, there is very little philanthropy as that is where most of the business of Nilkawt is based.  Backoutshire is the location of Matildaville, the former capital.  It is also the location of Arthurity, a much earlier seat of government.

Matildaville was the location of the long discredited and long disbanded Matildan School of Physical Education, Legal Traditions and Unjustifiable Wealth Transfers.  Most of the tendering processes for Nilkawt were long conducted from a sumptuous office in the old royal palace in Arthurity, now a suburb of Matildaville.  This occurred until the extensive irregularities were suitably acknowledged.

Since that time, the Secular Order of the Perpetual Wait has held a monopoly on several services in Nilkawt besides its outreach practices.  This includes the management of the still-quite-new cell-fee building in Matildaville.

Another monopoly of the Order, at least for the present, is its omnipotence and omnibenevolence within the Legislative Design Authority.  The authority is currently working from the Hike Kawt Court of the Caught, having supplied new, more private accommodation within the cell-fee building for the former residents of the court.  The court is also in Matildaville.

The two official parlours in the Palace of the Parlours, where the current Parliament of Nilkawt still officially sits, is itself situated in the former capital of Matildaville.  Nearby, in the village-suburb of Arthurity, is a museum.  It contains the original single-chambered, Quest Sinister Great Hall with its vast space and high roof and large, ancient round table.

Neither the current parliament nor the current staff of the museum are officially part of the Government of Nilkawt.  The parliament is merely where legislation in Nilkawt officially originates.  The Great Hall is where the myths and legends about Nilkawt usually originate.

As part of their outreach services, the sisters of the Order are available, twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week, to assist anyone seeking to dispel myths and legends and improve the official drafting legislation, anywhere in the world.  The sisters do, of course, charge a benevolence fee for this service.  The fee is their only compensation for the inconvenience of being on call at all hours of the day and night in all sorts of climatic and political conditions.

All the residential care institutions of Nilkawt are situated within Austrooliana.  That county is at a considerable distance from Backoutshire. The philanthropy in Austrooliana is expressed through the fact that all its residential care institutions, according to size, are described as companion houses and mingling mansions.  The upkeep of the public areas of those companion houses and mingling mansions, including the outdoor areas, is maintained by suitably gregarious, rostered members of the Secular Order of the Perpetual Wait.

The sisters also provide their sublimely secular outreach services towards the reform of ridiculous and ridiculously unfair traditions in Nilkawt.  They especially do so in Austrooliana.

The sisters always do their work in a spirit of magnanimity and equanimity, regardless of how menial or momentous that work nat be.  Members of the Order are always on hand to provide care for fearful members of the Nilkawtian public during any constitutional crisis.  The sisters do so mainly through their support for universally reasonable rules and regulations.

Since the new Head of State was appointed, Nilkawt has been known throughout the world for its culture of reasonable kindness and gentle ambition.  This has especially been the case since the restoration of the money key.

Nilkawt is also now known as a society devoted to its own improvement into perpetuity.  As with any society, recording the past in Nilkawt is a highly political activity, which is why this embassy is mainly devoted to recording the present.  No members of the Order currently hold official diplomatic positions on behalf of Nilkawt though a few are likely to exist within the Nilkawtian secret services.

As part of their official and public outreach services, and as an expression of their beliefs and values, the members of the Secular Order of the Perpetual Wait express their views on historical events only in a way likely to improve the future of the world.  Their main duty is to ensure every society can have an accountable government soon, without waiting into perpetuity for such an eventuality to occur.

The sisters do not participate judgementally in the work of the Hike Kawt Court of the Caught.  They are not permitted to have any say at all in the local Low Kawt Courts.  The Low Kawt Court judges are based in Backoutshire at the base of the small hill upon which the Hike Kawt Court of the Caught is situated.  The cell-fee building is on the other side of the hill, between the Hike Kawt Court of the Caught and the old royal palace in Matildaville.

There are usually no current sisters of the Perpetual Wait associated with the new royal palace, Palazzo Twaklinilkawt in Twaklinton.  The Ladies-in-Waiting are able, instead, to handle all the outreach services in the palace itself, particularly in and from the Thrown Room.

Most of the attention in Matildaville, and in Backoutshire more generally, is towards further industrial development and particularly towards business.  There have been considerable concerns expressed in Backoutshire that the Parliament of Nilkawt, and even the courts, will soon be transferred from Matildaville to Twaklinton.  The reason for this appears to be due to the fact that most international investors are still liable to confuse Matildaville in Backoutshire in Nilkawt with Matildaville in Virginia in the United States of America.

In order to dispel that misunderstanding, a beautiful new town called Amarika is currently being planned in a long abandoned industrial area of Backoutshire called Rerstberkitt.  An outreach service of the Perpetual Wait is already in the area, mainly to assist during the eviction of the current low-income residents.

All outreach services of the Perpetual Wait are considered to be seasonal, in any season of the year.  As outreach work is considered not just to be seasonal work but also as a casual occupation in Nilkawt, the sisters always expect to be paid a premium for the inconvenience of leaving their abbey and thereby being on constant call in the service of the public.

The sisters rarely participate in currency trading though they have been known to work as citizen-advocates from time to time.  They believe they should have a monopoly on the provision of citizen-advocacy as they consider it to be an outreach service.  This is at odds with most Nilkawtians, who believe their citizen-advocates should mainly be free of all potentially conflicting institutional associations.

Monday, 17 October 2016

New Trade and Investment Strategy

The Trade and Investment Commissioner for Nilkawt has one of the world's most important economic positions.  When the former commissioner became a the Minister for Health, Defence and Delightful Environments, it became necessary for the Nilkawtians to consider whether or not a new, equally competent Trade and Investment Commissioner should, and even could, be appointed to act on their behalf.

Even whilst fulfilling her new ministerial duties, the former commissioner continued, as efficiently as possible, to continue supporting Nilkawtian trade and investment.  Even so, this because somewhat difficult when working with her ministerial colleagues, particularly the Minister for Natural Limitations and Sustainable Trade and Minister for Brilliance, Prosperity and Pleasant Foreign Relations.

Whilst reviewing every aspect of Nilkawtian life in relation to health, defence and delightful environments, both in the context of financial considerations and interpersonal considerations, as well as economic development and social development,

The former commissioner continues to maintain her long-standing local government duties, ensuring shopping in Elegantshire is a pleasurable experience for anyone able to afford it.  Her duties have been streamlined with the assistance of The Most Reasonable Company of Simplifiers, as well as her highly competent personal staff.

Although business as usual has been maintained as suitably as possible throughout Nilkawt and this embassy, the interim, rostered holders of the trade and investment position have found it difficult to maintain suitable continuity in the role.

There are many investment opportunities in Nilkawt.  To ensure they are all properly nurtured and ever obnoxiously exploited, the Nilkawtian Interpersonal Standards Organisation, through its committees of inquiry, will independently monitor every economic situation.

Two highly experienced members of the aforementioned committees are Lady Daphne Tea-Cosy and Lady Cynthia Biscuit, who are both former officers of polite policing in Nilkawt.  During their policing duties they were officially known as aunties, not ladies.

Lady Daphne is a former Nilkawtian Minister for Courtesy and Moral Philosophy whilst Lady Cynthia is a former Deputy Minister for Courtesy and Moral Philosophy.  Lady Cynthia was, until recently, the Chief of Polite Policing for the whole of Nilkawt.  Lady Daphne has been the Chairpersonage of the International Standards Organisation for many years as well as being, until recently, the Deputy Chief of Polite Policing.

As two highly experienced experts on politeness, Lady Daphne and Lady Cynthia have been developing courses and workshops for anyone wishing to learn from their enlightened cultural leadership.  After considerable consultation with the former trade and investment commissioner, and with all the currently serving and formerly serving Nilkawtian commissioners and ministers and ladies-in-waiting, and the judges of the Hike Kawt Court of the Court, and the very private private secretaries to Her Illustrious Highness, Twaklin I, Ethereal Grand Duchess of Nilkawt, Lady Daphne and Lady Cynthia have tentatively implemented a new trade and investment strategy for Nilkawt.

Upholding the uncommon law of Nilkawt remains the highest priority of the ladies, in accordance with the Constitution.  Their second highest priority is to maintain pleasantly peaceful neighbourhood relations, both domestically and internationally, again in accordance with the Nilkawtian Constitution.

A new, acting, interim Trade and Investment Commissioner has now been appointed to oversee Nilkawt's streamlined new trade and investment strategy, in accordance with traditional transitional arrangements.

There is usually a great deal of legal work necessary whenever any Nilkawtian considers changing names, boundaries and titles.  The new, acting, interim Trade and Investment Commissioner for Nilkawt has already officially been given the new title of Acting Nilkawtian Interim Strategic Interests' Commissioner for Mutually Lucrative Trade and Peaceful Long-Term Investments.

The Nilkawtians, as upholders of enlightened democracy, wish to ensure wealth distribution remains equitably beneficial across their entire society.  They are deeply suspicious of foreign geostrategy and all other aspects of geopolitics and claims to spheres of influence.

The Nilkawtians also wish to ensure that all further industrial development of their society enhances their own quality of life considerably.  They never trust unenlightened nations, or the national of unenlightened nations, to do the right thing without proper supervision.  Even so, in accordance with the open international relations expressed through the mission of this digital embassy, the new Acting Nilkawtian Interim Strategic Interests' Commissioner for Mutually Lucrative Trade and Peaceful Long-Term Investments will continue to promote Nilkawt's excellent economy as an exportable, patented, franchising opportunity.

In accordance with the additional confidence provided through the Financial Services Review and the Immigration Review, the new Acting Nilkawtian Interim Strategic Interests' Commissioner for Mutually Lucrative Trade and Peaceful Long-Term Investments will promote and enhance the international status of the non-Twaklineque aspects of the culture industry of Nilkawt, in association with the Tourism Commissioner.

The name of the new Acting Nilkawtian Interim Strategic Interests' Commissioner for Mutually Lucrative Trade and Peaceful Long-Term Investments is Doctor Wanda Wye.  Doctor Wye is a former Nilkawtian Minister for Energy, Upkeep and Equal Opportunities.  She also has extensive international experience as a theatrical impresario

Doctor Wye has an additionally impressive résumé, demonstrating her vast knowledge of global financial and investment matters.  She understands the essential characteristics of the Enlightened Nations and a sense of belonging.  She is also willing and able to assist with the supply of refreshments and tax forums, as required.

Tuesday, 11 October 2016

New Humour Rights Commissioner

As the previous occupant of the highest position in the Humour Rights Commission has now been transferred to a situation in which she supervises former traditions, it has been necessary to appoint a new Humour Rights Commissioner.

As has previously been the case, the new Humour Rights Commissioner will continue to be responsible for monitoring and monetising the expression of all non-Twaklinesque culture within Nilkawt itself.

As the Humour Rights Commissioner has always taken precedence over all other commissioners in Nilkawt, the new commissioner, Jen Raleigh-Wright, Duchess of Boundaries, will be expected to continue the most important work of her predecessor.

The priorities for the duchess will most likely include the continuation of the Financial Services Review, with an emphasis on economic development, currency trading and government revenues.

There is also likely to be a review of the system of honours, to ensure it does not become too ridiculous.

Friday, 7 October 2016

National Museum of Former Traditions

All marchionesses in Nilkawt are now employed in the recently opened National Museum of Former Traditions.  This obviously includes the former Humour Rights Commissioner, The Exceedingly Honourable The Marchioness of Passatempo, Lady Felicia Gioconda Allegra Divertimento.

At regular times each day at the new museum, all former ceremonies and associated practices in relation to formerly official traditional ribbons are formally performed using genuine traditional official ribbons and genuine marchionesses.

To ensure that the current Marchioness of Algorithms can remain employed in the royal palace as one of the most senior Women of the Bedchamber amongst the Ladies-in-Waiting, her most senior title is about to be ceremoniously upgraded to the Duchess of Rent.  In her new capacity, the Marchioness of Algorithms, as the Duchess of Rent, will supervise the transformation of the former Nilkawtian traditions of rent taking and rent seeking to ensure they comply with dignified digital and financial realities in an enlightened, democratic society.

The new museum contains a display on how Ladies-in-Waiting were formerly formally appointed.  There is also a display on how to become a Lady-in-Waiting to the Ethereal Grand Duchess in the months and years ahead.

All new titles in Nilkawt are currently based on merit, unless a substantial sum of money is supplied for the privilege of having additional privileges.  Nilkawt has never been an armigerous or otherwise harmful society.

It has been a surprise to many returning citizens that so many changes in traditions have occurred in Nilkawt.


Wednesday, 5 October 2016

International Training Centre for the Harmonious Interplay of Beauty, Understanding and Magnificence

For some time now, the sublime secretariat of the International Training Centre for the Harmonious Interplay of Beauty, Understanding and Magnificence has been based on the new royal palace, Palazzo Twaklinilkawt in Twaklinton, the new capital city of Nilkawt.

The new Nilkawtian head of state has long been associated with the training centre.  Many currently eminent persons have trained through the establishment, including a former Nilkawtian Minister of Communications.

All education and training in Nilkawt has recently been supervised and reviewed by the Minister for Education, Training and Interpersonal Niceties, Mr Nick MacYavelly.  The Minister has placed much emphasis on developing the reputation of the Dada School of Management over the past year.

Meanwhile, the Nilkawtian head of state, Her Illustrious Highness, Twaklin I, Ethereal Grand Duchess of Nilkawt, has continued with her work as the chief executive officer of the International Training Centre for the Harmonious Interplay of Beauty, Understanding and Magnificence.

Training offered through the centre has been available in many locations around the world and not just in Nilkawt itself.

Training in citizen-journalism has been based mainly in Adelaide in Australia.  Two volumes of study notes on the subject of citizen-journalism have recently been archived:

Volume One

Volume Two


Training in ethereal economics has also been based mainly in Adelaide in Australia in recent years.  A volume of documentation on that subject has now been archived, too:

Ethereal economics


Training in Twaklinological studies has been conducted in many locations, including an Adelaidean science studio.  There is a large volume of documentation related to the subject:

Twaklinology archive


Training in enlightenment has been clearly outlined by the sublime secretariat staff since first developing and introducing the work of the centre to the world from Adelaide:

21st century Enlightenment


As most students around the world are unable to attend courses in Nilkawt, and probably not in Adelaide, either, there are many other locations in which they can be trained in the harmonious interplay of beauty, understanding and magnificence.

Ethereal introductory quaternary tutorials