Monday, 24 October 2016

Outreach Services of the Perpetual Wait

The Secular Order of the Perpetual Wait has its main training headquarters in the secluded Abbey of Needle's Eye.  The abbey is difficult to reach.  Like the rest of Nilkawt, it does not have an Internet service or a telephone connection to the outside world.

Unlike the rest of Nilkawt, the abbey has no connection to the national Intranet service.  Nor does it have any connections to any local area mobile telephone networks.

The abbey is situated in one of the most remote regions of Nilkawt, ensuring its seclusion but not necessarily its secularity.  To ensure its secularity is maintained, the Order of the Perpetual Wait is legislatively required to provide outreach services to all and sundry.  It does so not from the abbey itself but from its additional, much more temporary and temporal educational establishments.

Nilkawt is renowned across the globe for its educational and outreach services, whether by secular orders, international training centres, highly competent staff or infallible automatons.  Any envelopes or packages or postcards addressed to the abbey are redirected to the Secular Establishment of the Perpetual Wait in the capital, Twaklinton.

As a highly advanced, highly educated, calm, reasonable, rational and sensible sort of society, Nilkawt has a deep respect for evidence-based knowledge.  All seclusion therefore serves a similar personal, interpersonal and societal usefulness as all other forms of Nilkawtian learning.

Since a former abbess of Needle's Eye served a term as a Nilkawtian government minister, the educational work within the abbey itself has become better known in the outside world.  The former Department of Immigration and Broader Inspection has now become a considerably automated service.  This means that its former staff can now spend their time doing less tedious and less frustrating work.

In Nilkawt, as in many societies, there is a perpetual wait for redundancy packages.  In view of this, all Nilkawtians are now required to begin retraining for new work as soon as they become bored or frustrated in their existing occupations.  They have the option of reducing the hours in their occupations until completing the retraining on a part-time basis, or giving in their notice and completing the retraining on a full-time basis.

The first five hundred hours of retraining are currently supplied solely through the outreach services of the Perpetual Wait.  The first one hundred hours examine why the trainee has been doing a soul-less occupation.

Every job in Nilkawt is meant to be interesting, uplifting and intrinsically rewarding for the occupant, hence psychological, sociological and philosophical assessments of the trainee are integral to the early training process.  Every job in Nilkawt has been designed to be clean, tidy and practical, within reason.

If you are wondering how to become a Lady-in-Waiting to the Nilkawtian Head of State, the highly democratic process begins through the outreach services of the Perpetual Wait.  All members of the Order of the Perpetual Wait involved in supplying the outreach services are highly trained in psychology, sociology and philosophy, amongst other subjects.

No other persons are eligible to supply outreach services within Nilkawt. Even so, all Nilkawtians are expected to supply outreach services to the rest of the world, with or without all the necessary training.

Training in global outreach and peaceful advocacy can easily be acquired throughout the county of Cupateeunkaique.  It is a location in which affectionate co-operation and practical altruism are noticeably prevalent.  That is why the services of the Perpetual Wait are not required within Cupateeunkaique itself.

To maintain the pleasantness of Cupateeunkaique, and all other pleasant areas of Nilkawt, the local government administration of each Nilkawtian county is responsible for determining the local necessity for local outreach services.  As ceremonial local representatives of the Head of State, the relevant Heads of Counties, such as the Countess of Cupateeunkaique, provide the ceremonial authority for opening and closing and beginning and ending anything officially associated with the governing bodies of Nilkawt.

The Countess of Cupateeunkaique, who is herself a former member of the Order of the Perpetual Wait and a former Lady-in-Waiting, has been conducting an international investigation into outreach services through her duties on behalf of the Nilkawtian Political Reform Commission.  The world is, apparently, still not aware that Nilkawt is, at least for the present, the most enlightened and most democratic and most peaceful and most prosperous society ever to have existed.

The constitutional duties of the Nilkawtian Head of State are always performed with the utmost dignity.  Everyone in Nilkawt is required to perform their own duties with the utmost dignity too, even when bored, annoyed, frustrated or otherwise irritable.  

Credibility is so much easier to maintain with dignity, regardless of the accuracy of the information supplied or the competence of the supplier.  It is fortunate indeed, therefore, that the Nilkawtian Head of State is also highly competent.

As the Ethereal Patroness of the Secular Order of the Perpetual Wait, Her Illustrious Highness is the sole authority with the right to grant members of the Order with permission to leave the confines of their cloister on a temporary or permanent basis.  

Permission has only been granted, in the past, for a sister to leave the Abbey of Needle's Eye temporarily for one of the following reasons:

To take up temporary ministerial duties in the Goverment of Nilkawt, and/or

To provide temporary outreach services in Nilkawt and/or in the international sphere


Permission has only been granted to leave the abbey permanently:

To became a Lady-in-Waiting to Her Illustrious Highness, or

To explore the possibility of voluntarily developing non-asexual relationships

All serving members of the Order are always non-sexual in their dealings with everyone.  They are permitted to develop affectionate attachments of asexual intimacy, but only in private.  The same applies to Ladies-in-Waiting, who are required to maintain many of the same habits as the sisters but with a more extensive wardrobe and prettier footwear.

No-one with voluntary experience of non-asexual relationships is permitted to participate intimately in the supply of outreach activities through the Order.  To seek non-asexual relationships through the provision of outreach services is against the rules of the Order.

When any of the sisters reaches out her hand through her outreach activities, no-one could accuse her of having ulterior motives, no matter how much she flutters her eyelashes or how prettily she smiles.  She is likely to express emotional warmth whilst holding someone's hand or giving a person a hug or wiping away someone's tears, but this is always achieved silently.  The silence provides the necessary level of dignity, decorum and professional detachment.

Several sisters are currently providing outreach services through the Sublime Secretariat in Palazzo Twaklinilkawt.  Much of the routine work of the secretariat is now performed by a royal robot and three noble automatons.  There is nothing routine about the supply of outreach services, hence they can only be successfully performed by ordinary mortal humans and other living species.

Ethereal persons in the Ethereal Grand Duchy of Nilkawt, or anywhere else in the world, as well as corporate persons and various founts of honour, cannot provide the care required, except through fiction and works of history.  To provide an outreach service is a highly noble and highly spiritual pursuit, as long as it does not annoy either the providers or those being served.

As the outreach services of the Perpetual Wait are non-traditional, non-static and non-state-based, and they are never advertised, they are only usually communicated on a person-to-person basis.  The services may sometimes feature in media reports but usually only when the sisters are seeking the mutual support of the public.

The sisters believe most marketing is predatory and should be avoided by all good persons.  This applies both in terms of its supply and its receipt.  Similar beliefs are shared by most Nilkawtians.

Just as Nilkawt has many laws against trespassers and other nuisances, Nilkawtians would never intentionally trespass on anyone elsewhere or make a nuisance of themselves in other ways.  Nilkawt has many intentional communities, settlements and residential care institutions where professional services of the highest quality are available on a permanent basis.

Philanthropy in Nilkawt is particularly common in Cupateeunkaique, even during non-festive times.  In that location, the philanthropy is often associated with altruism, empathy and kindness.

In Foolya, on the other hand, philanthropy is associated mainly with the arts.

In Twaklinton, philanthropy is mainly associated with food and drink, tourism and other forms of hospitality, relaxation and celebration.

In Elegantshire, there is little philanthropy.  This is mostly due to the fact that the people living there, or even staying there temporarily, are expected to pay for professional services using their own substantial wealth for such purposes.  they are also expected to pay for all the other goods and services they require.  If the residents of Elegantshire wish to be philanthropists, they usually do so by donating sums of their own choosing to whatever they personally consider to be worthy causes.

In Dada, philanthropy is usually expressed through satire.

In Backoutshire, there is very little philanthropy as that is where most of the business of Nilkawt is based.  Backoutshire is the location of Matildaville, the former capital.  It is also the location of Arthurity, a much earlier seat of government.

Matildaville was the location of the long discredited and long disbanded Matildan School of Physical Education, Legal Traditions and Unjustifiable Wealth Transfers.  Most of the tendering processes for Nilkawt were long conducted from a sumptuous office in the old royal palace in Arthurity, now a suburb of Matildaville.  This occurred until the extensive irregularities were suitably acknowledged.

Since that time, the Secular Order of the Perpetual Wait has held a monopoly on several services in Nilkawt besides its outreach practices.  This includes the management of the still-quite-new cell-fee building in Matildaville.

Another monopoly of the Order, at least for the present, is its omnipotence and omnibenevolence within the Legislative Design Authority.  The authority is currently working from the Hike Kawt Court of the Caught, having supplied new, more private accommodation within the cell-fee building for the former residents of the court.  The court is also in Matildaville.

The two official parlours in the Palace of the Parlours, where the current Parliament of Nilkawt still officially sits, is itself situated in the former capital of Matildaville.  Nearby, in the village-suburb of Arthurity, is a museum.  It contains the original single-chambered, Quest Sinister Great Hall with its vast space and high roof and large, ancient round table.

Neither the current parliament nor the current staff of the museum are officially part of the Government of Nilkawt.  The parliament is merely where legislation in Nilkawt officially originates.  The Great Hall is where the myths and legends about Nilkawt usually originate.

As part of their outreach services, the sisters of the Order are available, twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week, to assist anyone seeking to dispel myths and legends and improve the official drafting legislation, anywhere in the world.  The sisters do, of course, charge a benevolence fee for this service.  The fee is their only compensation for the inconvenience of being on call at all hours of the day and night in all sorts of climatic and political conditions.

All the residential care institutions of Nilkawt are situated within Austrooliana.  That county is at a considerable distance from Backoutshire. The philanthropy in Austrooliana is expressed through the fact that all its residential care institutions, according to size, are described as companion houses and mingling mansions.  The upkeep of the public areas of those companion houses and mingling mansions, including the outdoor areas, is maintained by suitably gregarious, rostered members of the Secular Order of the Perpetual Wait.

The sisters also provide their sublimely secular outreach services towards the reform of ridiculous and ridiculously unfair traditions in Nilkawt.  They especially do so in Austrooliana.

The sisters always do their work in a spirit of magnanimity and equanimity, regardless of how menial or momentous that work nat be.  Members of the Order are always on hand to provide care for fearful members of the Nilkawtian public during any constitutional crisis.  The sisters do so mainly through their support for universally reasonable rules and regulations.

Since the new Head of State was appointed, Nilkawt has been known throughout the world for its culture of reasonable kindness and gentle ambition.  This has especially been the case since the restoration of the money key.

Nilkawt is also now known as a society devoted to its own improvement into perpetuity.  As with any society, recording the past in Nilkawt is a highly political activity, which is why this embassy is mainly devoted to recording the present.  No members of the Order currently hold official diplomatic positions on behalf of Nilkawt though a few are likely to exist within the Nilkawtian secret services.

As part of their official and public outreach services, and as an expression of their beliefs and values, the members of the Secular Order of the Perpetual Wait express their views on historical events only in a way likely to improve the future of the world.  Their main duty is to ensure every society can have an accountable government soon, without waiting into perpetuity for such an eventuality to occur.

The sisters do not participate judgementally in the work of the Hike Kawt Court of the Caught.  They are not permitted to have any say at all in the local Low Kawt Courts.  The Low Kawt Court judges are based in Backoutshire at the base of the small hill upon which the Hike Kawt Court of the Caught is situated.  The cell-fee building is on the other side of the hill, between the Hike Kawt Court of the Caught and the old royal palace in Matildaville.

There are usually no current sisters of the Perpetual Wait associated with the new royal palace, Palazzo Twaklinilkawt in Twaklinton.  The Ladies-in-Waiting are able, instead, to handle all the outreach services in the palace itself, particularly in and from the Thrown Room.

Most of the attention in Matildaville, and in Backoutshire more generally, is towards further industrial development and particularly towards business.  There have been considerable concerns expressed in Backoutshire that the Parliament of Nilkawt, and even the courts, will soon be transferred from Matildaville to Twaklinton.  The reason for this appears to be due to the fact that most international investors are still liable to confuse Matildaville in Backoutshire in Nilkawt with Matildaville in Virginia in the United States of America.

In order to dispel that misunderstanding, a beautiful new town called Amarika is currently being planned in a long abandoned industrial area of Backoutshire called Rerstberkitt.  An outreach service of the Perpetual Wait is already in the area, mainly to assist during the eviction of the current low-income residents.

All outreach services of the Perpetual Wait are considered to be seasonal, in any season of the year.  As outreach work is considered not just to be seasonal work but also as a casual occupation in Nilkawt, the sisters always expect to be paid a premium for the inconvenience of leaving their abbey and thereby being on constant call in the service of the public.

The sisters rarely participate in currency trading though they have been known to work as citizen-advocates from time to time.  They believe they should have a monopoly on the provision of citizen-advocacy as they consider it to be an outreach service.  This is at odds with most Nilkawtians, who believe their citizen-advocates should mainly be free of all potentially conflicting institutional associations.